ZA: Zombies Anonymous (2007) 6/10

ZA: Zombies Anonymous is a unique zombie film that poses the question: What if intelligent zombies actually existed, and how would they be treated by the rest of society?

The film begins with a boyfriend murdering his girlfriend after a heated argument. From here on we follow the recently zombified girl and the murdering boyfriend as they try to exist in a new world. We see the difficulties and prejudice the zombies experience as well as the fear and anger of the living. The murderer joins an anti-zombie militia while the girl joins an anti-living militia. Action and violence ensues.

Thank goodness some intelligent zombie flicks are starting to pop up. Fido was one of the first films, and there it was mostly a commentary of 50's American society. Here the film poses many unique questions like, do zombies continue to get the government disability they received when they were alive? Can a zombie stand trial and accuse their killer? What would society feel about zombies working side by side with the living? Essentially its a film about prejudice put into a horror context, and rather intelligently too. Its nice to see the horror genre being used as a satirical and social commentary rather then simply senseless violence. I cannot praise the script writers enough here for the audacity to take on such a huge subject as prejudice. The problem is the film was originally 108 minutes and was cut to 91, and the cuts are pretty rough. Towards the end of the film the motivations and relationships between characters become confusing. I feel that some essential material was taken out in order to cut the run time. That's a shame because it certainly negatively impacts the film. Don't get me wrong, a film like this shouldn't be pushing two hours, but there may have been other less essential scenes to cut. Beyond that the anti-zombie militia leader is terribly written and acted even worse. The woman that plays the role is not convincing and comes off as irritating and unbelievable. She plays a fairly significant role in the film and it really brings the project down on the whole. The last 15 minutes of the film are nothing more then poorly acted and poorly directed action scenes that get tiresome very quickly.

In the end ZA: Zombies Anonymous is an excellent micro budget attempt on a difficult subject. Sadly the last 15 minutes killed it for me and pulled the film from a solid 7 down into a 6. Check it out if you're looking for a unique indie horror flick but be prepared for a shaky ending.

Gore - mild

Nudity- none

Overall - 6/10

Going To Pieces: The Rise and Fall Of the Slasher Film (2006) 7/10

I'm a big fan of early 80's slasher flicks, especially the slew that Tom Savini did the FX for. I figured a documentary that focused on the subgenre only would be an in depth interesting treat. Somehow the film makers were able to have to broad of a brush stroke and not enough depth.

Going To Pieces.... is a documentary about...well...the rise and fall of the slasher film. It traces its roots all the way back to Peeping Tom and Psycho and brings us all the way to Hostel. There's interviews with numerous directors, special fx artists, magazine editors and critics including Wes Craven, Sean Cunningham, Tom Savini, Tony Timpone and many others.

The documentary is pretty dang informative and covers alot of ground in less then 90 minutes. The film includes the history, the influences, the critical review, the major films, the lesser known gems, and the crappy rip 0ffs too. The interviews are pretty interesting as well, the film makers were able to dig up some pretty obscure directors and get their take on the whole phenomenon. The problem is that the film actually has too broad of a focus for its run time. Each subject is blown threw in a matter of minutes and then its on to the next topic. The problem is that there's really a lack of depth here. Most of what's presented can be found in other documentaries and publications, and for the most part, with more depth to boot. Its certainly a great film for horror fans that have yet to investigate the genre and lays some good groundwork for more focused works that may not include all the subjects found here.

Going to Pieces is a great documentary for those new to the genre but aside from some unique interviews the film doesn't represent anything that can't be found elsewhere.

Overall - 7/10

The Legacy (1979) 5/10

I love Sam Elliot. The mustache, the cowboy drawl, the deep voice. He's just so damn awesome. So when I found out that he was in a horror flick about crazy supernatural powers, I knew I had to check it out. Turns out the most shocking thing in this film was seeing the man's bare backside.

The Legacy is about a group of people invited to an old manor in England by a mysterious host. They find out that said host is a Satanist and has brought them together to share in the power of the six, evil power that will go to them after he passes. Of course the six people all want the power for themselves so they begin to kill each other.

The Legacy was made at the tail end of the 70's and oozes the philosophy of the time. Free sex, women empowerment, hatred for the church, it's all here. The problem is the film's pacing is pretty dated as well. Its slow going and very little action is found throughout the film. Its more atmospheric and creepy then actually scary. There's no gore to speak of and the acting is rather dry as well. A brief appearance from the singer of the Who doesn't help matters much either. The real action is all saved for the last fifteen minutes or so and its too little too late when it finally hits. I won't give it away here, but I certainly found the ending to be rather anti-climatic as well.

The Legacy is a horror film that has not aged well. Creepy and atmospheric, as well as bland describe the film to a T.

Gore- mild

Nudity- Sam Elliot, so it doesn't count

Overall - 5/10

Zombie Town (2006) 7/10

Recently there's been a huge influx of cheap zombie flix flooding the markets. Just like in the 80's, studios and distributors have realized that zombie flicks are cheap to make and always make money. Because of this there's been alot of crap lately (i'm looking at you day of the dead remake!) Zombie Town, thankfully, is not one of them.

Ever seen Night of the Creeps? How about Slither? Well Zombie Town lifts its plot directly from those. Slug like parasites turn people into zombies and now there's zombies over running a small town. Its up to a rag tag group of locals to stop the plague from spreading.

There's really nothing new here to be found in Zombie Town. Honestly at this point I can't really expect to be surprised by a zombie flick. This one tries to be funny without going over board and heaps on the gore and was made on the cheap. The pacing is quick and the script is actually pretty funny in parts. The gore is convincing and plentiful. Of course the kick ass heroine in the film is very poorly written and acted but hey at least they tried right? I really have no complaints with this one. Its just a solid gory fun zombie flick.

Zombie Town is a competently directed and acted zombie gore flick that is short and sweet. Perfectly executed generic zombie movie #4003. At this point its pretty hard to make an interesting and not irritating zombie flick so that in itself is quite an achievement, especially given the limited budget. Check it out.

Gore-medium/high

Nudity-none

Overall - 7/10

Heavy Metal In Baghdad (2008) 8/10

Metal and Metalheads are all over the globe. Name a country and there's probably a metal band from there and plenty of metalheads. Its much more widespread then most people believe. That being said I never thought that a metal band could exist in the war torn country of Iraq.

Heavy Metal In Baghdad is about Acrassicauda a metal band just trying to making it in a country bent on stopping them. The documentary follows the band members as they try to put on shows where bullets and mortars fly and permission must be given by the government as well as by the American troops.

The film is an amazing time capsule of the Iraq war from the perspective of some young Iraqis caught in the cross fire. We find out that they can be shot just for having long hair or goatees. If they wear any metal shirts they can be killed by snipers just for having western clothing on. They get death threats and their practice space is even bombed. The members decide to flee the country in hopes of a brighter future in a free country but cannot escape the tyrannical grip of the totalitarian governments that surround Iraq. Why? Because they're Iraqi. They can't get visas to any western countries because of their citizenship. They're stuck between a rock and a hard place, and all they want to do is shred. The film shows the shocking reality of the people living in Iraq and the danger they face just going out to get some food. Thankfully the film isn't too political either. Really its just a portrayal of life in Iraq told from the mouths of people who've lived it. The viewer's political affiliation will probably not be tested but strengthened depending on your beliefs about the war.

Heavy Metal In Baghdad is an important film for anyone who loves metal or for anybody that would like to see how life really is in the war torn country. Highly Recommended.

Overall - 8/10

Teeth (2007) 3/10

Teeth is an indie horror festival favorite that finds itself on the cheesy Dimension Extreme dvd line, a line known for its hit and miss reputation. For me, this one's certainly a miss.

Teeth is about a young girl who preaches the gospel of abstinence to other teens who unbeknownst to her, just happens to have a pair of teeth in her naughty bits.

So automatically I have a really hard time swallowing the absolutely liberal and feminist ideals found within this one. First off the film plays like a horror/comedy and the joke's on anybody who's decided to abstain from pre-martial sex. As if young people don't have enough pressure to have sex, this film nails them once again by mocking their beliefs and making fun of anyone who actually has any moral standards. The film also portrays the abstinence followers as brain washed teens who only believe in moral fortitude because of their laughable faith in God. Yay, yet another film that mocks young people's faith in religion. Just what the world needs, more fuel for the "do whatever the hell you want and screw the consequences," philosophy. Needless to say it was hard for me to stomach. Another axe I have to grind is the overwhelming negative portrayal of men in this film. According to this movie all young boys are morons, rapists, and have no appreciation for women as human beings at all. See, boys and girls, that's what we call feminist sexism. Sorry but not all guys are scum bags and not all women are wonderful. Actually, we're all human and have faults. And of course the main character's brother is a metal head that treats women like dirt, is prone to violence, and has no respect for his parents. Oh and he's in love with his sister in a sexual way. Metalhead and punks are always easy targets but i would have expected a bit more from a liberal crap fest then that. Once again, not all of us are scum bags, in fact most metal heads and punks are downright decent hard working blue collar folk.

Whew, that being said the film itself aside from the totally disgusting, infuriating and abhorrent political philosophy and sexist characterizations, isn't all that bad i guess. The film is competently directed and acted and has some seriously gross gore. In fact I get the feeling that when the film was sent out to festivals, there was less gore, and that for the dimension extreme release they stuck some juicy bits in to appeal to the horror audience.

In the end Teeth just has too obvious of a liberal feminist anti religion anti moral anti male axe to grind for me to swallow the rest of the film. If you believe in global warming, peace through pacifism, vegetarianism, socialism, and plain old garden variety sexism check this one out. If you have a brain in your head, don't bother.

Gore- medium

Nudity-plenty of severed man parts if that's your thing

Overall - 3/10

Broceliande (2002) 5/10

So I'm a huge fan of the recent new wave of grisly french horror. I picked up Broceliande thinking that although it wouldn't be gory, perhaps it would still be compelling. It was, up to a point.

Broceliande is about a young girl attending archeology school. She helps to uncover a druidic temple with her class, but when her teachers and class mates end up dead its up to her to discover who, or what is killing these people.

I was expecting some crazy awesome ghost or monster killer type stuff and in the last fifteen minutes there is indeed a monster of sorts but by that point it was really to little to late. The film progresses much like an Italian giallo up until about the halfway point and after that the film devolves into a chase sequence through ancient catacombs....for about 45 minutes. The film completely goes off the rails at this point and becomes nothing more then a silly action sequence that isn't competently acted nor directed. I will say that the monster is pretty damn cool looking and its a wonder why they didn't pull it out earlier.

In the end Broceliande's pacing is terrible and seems like half a giallo, half an American action cheese fest, but it adds up to a mediocre forgettable film that does nothing to further the french horror cause.

Gore- mild

Nudity-mild

Overall - 5/10